Friday Fictioneers – Rhythm

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Image courtesy of Douglas M. MacIlroy

Blaring alarm when the clock strikes 7

Sweeping bristles against the teeth

Pattering water in the shower

Whispering grumble of the car engine

Off-sync drumming of footsteps on the streets

Splattering coffee against the paper cup

Mocking ding of the elevator

Marching keys of the keyboard

Brooming of the printer head

Scraping of the fork against the Chinese take out box

Marching keys of the keyboard

Brooming of the printer head

Freeing ding of the elevator

Whispering sighs of the car engine.

Music of the tiny running footsteps…

Creaking of the front door door…

Heavenly giggles of children…

Laughter…

Home.

 

 

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An ode to the ideal tune and rhythm of life.

For more entries on this prompt, check here.

16 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers – Rhythm

    • Thanks, Jessie! Yes, the first draft included a person in the narrative. But I thought it’d be better if the story will just follow a series of sounds. It’s also noteworthy how a particular sound changes its meaning depending on the timing/context. This is a fun experiment for me so I appreciate your kind words. 🙂

  1. This is lovely! The style of the short clipped sentences got the boringness (is that a word?) of the day across so nicely. And the end – giggles, laughter, home. Cheers!

    • I’m happy you noticed the length of each sentence. Sounds tend to be fleeting, but it resonates a meaning that lingers. That’s what I was trying to do. And as it culminates in the end, it gets shorter. It gets lighter. 🙂 Cheers!

    • Thanks! I really wanted to capture the madness of the day through sounds. So while each sound was cut into lines, there were no punctuations to put them apart. Because everything seems so fast – or even simultaneous. And the only punctuations in it are written as the flow culminates to the day’s cathartic moment.

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